Just say no to LiLo

I saw two bad movies this weekend. The first was Will Smith's thriller I am Legend. Entertaining and suspenseful, but improbable and disappointing. The second was - and I hesitate to admit this - Herbie: Fully Loaded. Really bad, even for a movie meant to entertain a 6-year-old. And it left me with this insatiable desire to cat fight Lindsay Lohan. I've never had an urge to pull someone's hair so badly. I may or may not have told Mr. Dub I wanted to rub her face in "dung butter." And I don't even know where one buys a good dung butter these days.

Seen any bad movies lately?

Even better, seen any good ones?

What is a random sampling of Mrs. Dub's favorite movies?

* Rushmore
* Running on Empty
* Best in Show
* Little Women
* Out of Africa
* The Royal Tenenbaums
* Savannah Smiles
* The Wrong Guy
* Stealing Home
* Nacho Libre
* Say Anything
* The Power of One
* Life is Beautiful
* Stranger than Fiction
* Raising Arizona

What are your favorite flicks?

(Mostly because I need something good to watch during this writer's strike, which I understand but nonetheless lament as all our shows go on hiatus indefinitely.)

p.s. I don't watch R-rated flicks unless they're edited so hook me up with some PG-13ers, please!

p.p.s. I seriously contemplated adding Overboard to this list.

HTT - Upfront Edition

Today’s Hot Topic is a tragic one that can only begin with this heated declaration:

Movies and TV suck.

Like, for real.

As members of Blockbuster Online, we have the privilege of viewing nearly all new releases, minus those rated-R ones. (Which may make this topic null and void, except I can’t endure all the drugs, sex, violence and potty mouths to explore that.)

I usually base my selections on previews, some which almost make me call a babysitter until I remember ticket prices these days. (What are we up to? $35? $40? And don’t get me started on the cost of Jujubes.) But when the movies come out on DVD – like, three weeks later – I am disappointed time and time again.

Last weekend, it was “Catch and Release,” starring Jennifer Garner, who I’m pretty confident would be my new best friend if given the chance to meet me. But even her dimples couldn’t save this flop. It was like there were actual pieces of the script that had gone missing, but no one cared enough to find them.

I won’t even talk about “The Lake House,” which may be the worst piece of celluloid in decades. That film was clearly written in an obscure tribal language and then half-heartedly translated into English. Hence it’s total nonsensicality.

The only good thing about all of this is that my expectations are so low that anything vaguely entertaining gets my star of approval. And yet, I’ve only given out stars to a handful of recent flicks.

Same goes for TV.

This week is the “upfronts” in NYC, where all the networks announce their fall schedules, and thereby determine the fate of struggling series and hopeful pilots. Since my dear friend, Kristin, has the inside scoop on this stuff, I’ve been privy to the plots of some new shows.

Let’s just say you could summarize all of them by filling in the blanks:
“It’s ‘Desperate Housewives’ but with __________.”
“It’s ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ but set in ____________.”
“It’s ‘Sex and the City’ if ___________ were in charge.”

To which you can fill in my response:
“The ___ network is totally devoid of creativity and ingenuity.”

Seriously, “Veronica Mars” – whose first seasons was akin to “My So-called Life” - is likely getting axed but “Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll” will live on … and on … and on.

Here’s what we currently TiVo:
“The Office”
“24”
“Lost”
“Veronica Mars”
“Psych”
"Project Runway"
“Iron Chef America”
“Gilmore Girls” – which takes its final bow tonight!

That’s it. And I’m not even that excited about many of those shows – either because they’ve lost their touch after a few seasons (24, VM & GG), or I wish I never started to watch them because they play with my mind and emotions (Lost).

The rest of TV makes me a little annoyed. Although I’m sure there are some good shows out there I’m missing, which is why you must plead their case in the comments section below.

I mean, is any out there actually watching “Two and Half Men”? Because someone clearly is, according to my pal, Nielsen.

What about you?

Do you think TV and movies are at their prime or prime for a makeover?

Do tell.

p.s. How much do you want Jim and Pam to kiss and make up? (Acceptable answers: "A lot," or "Mucho much.")

From matches to movies

OK. I get it. Apparently, most of you (and you know who you are) aren't as excited about matchmaking as I am. You think that our single friends are going to magically connect with other single folk in other states without our help. OK. Fine. Be that way. I even left my last post up for longer than normal to see if it garnered any exra love. But no. It's enough to make a girl WRITE IN CAPS!

On to lighter subjects: MOVIES.

Today I officially downgraded our Blockbuster online account to ONE movie at a time. Yes, we've gone from THREE to TWO to only ONE. But to Blockbuster's credit, they now allow you to return your DVD to the actual Blockbuster store in exchange for a movie rental. (For free! I know!) So it's like having TWO movies at a time in essence. Plus, we were running out of movies to watch and time to watch them.

But in our time with Blockbuster (both our TWO free trial memberships and official paid ONE), we've seen the good, the bad and the ugly. Here are a few high and low lights:


THE GOOD

Stranger than Fiction - Oh my goodness, if I didn't already have a crush on Will Ferrell*, I do now. Except I already did because he's the funniest man EVER so my love just deepened. But he's not funny in this role. He's more like the real Will (or so I hear) - quiet, quirky and unassuming. The movie's plot is clever and well-presented. And Maggie Gyllenhaal may have the world's dopiest brother, but she looks like she could be my sister, and she favors ballet flats. So I like her.

The Prestige - Watched this one last night. It almost blew my mind up with it's twists, turns and time travel. But, happily, the cerebrum survived. A weird but good movie about magic. (So is The Illusionist. And, yes, I refuse to pick a favorite between the two.)

Veronica Mars, seasons 1 & 2 - Try it. You'll like it. (Seriously. You want me to go ALL CAPS on you again?)

THE BAD (or somewhat decent)

World Trade Center - Once we figured out they were going to be stuck for most of the two hours, we bailed. Besides, we knew it was going to turn out OK. And it's the thought that counts, right?

Stick It - I know. I'm publicly admitting that we rented this movie. And that it wasn't horrible. It's just that I've had a soft spot for Beau Bridges ever since his TV movie "A Summer to Remember."

THE UGLY

King Kong - Some of you may have liked this movie. I wanted to throw myself off the Empire State building while watching it. So we have our differences. From the 1,000 way-too-long scenes involving over-sized insects to a woman loving a mutant ape, it was a little too much for me.

School for Scoundrels - We couldn't even make it five minutes into this one. Sorry, Heder. You may be Mormon but your last few picks have been busts. (Just Like Heaven? C'mon!) We're hoping Blades of Glory will reignite your flame.

Got any rave reviews to pass along? Comment away.

* Other celebrity crushes: David Duchovny, John Krasinski and Jason Bateman. Yes, I like my men smart and funny (like Mr. Dub). Oh, and Josh Duhamel, who doesn't strike me as smart or funny but he is hot.