musings and misadventures: Insurance woes, or why I want to be a man

7.23.2008

Insurance woes, or why I want to be a man

Have you ever wondered if I am really a man?

I haven't. I mean, I've never been a high-maintenance gal, but I've always been grounded in my femininity. I love salad, for heaven's sake. So it came as some surprise when my insurance began refusing to pay for my obstetrician bills on the grounds that I wasn't a woman.

Yeah, they thought I was a man. Thankfully, one phone call was all it took to persuade them otherwise. (I would have been a little ashamed if they would have insisted on a birth certificate or makeup bag examination. I do have a husky voice, after all.) So the good news is that I can continue to use the lady's room instead of going to the plain ol' bathroom, since men refuse to call it the "gentleman's quarters" ... or maybe just my husband won't.

The bad news is that I am now being charged an extra 400 snaps a month for maternity coverage, which I don't technically need right now, but which I hope to need sometime next year. (Presuming my lady parts get their act together.) I guess they weren't charging me for maternity coverage when they thought I was a dude, assuming it was some sort of clerical error. And, thankfully, they aren't making me pay back payments, but an extra $400 a month isn't cheap - bringing the grand total to $850 a month for me and Miss Dub.

Yeah, my husband's work doesn't provide group insurance for spouses - boo! You can get a pre-tax plan, but it's got all the bells and whistles (aromatherapy, venom-based prescriptions, etc.) so it's much pricier than most independent plans. Too bad, because independent plans won't cover my endocrinology care, which constitutes a large chunk of my medical needs. And I really wonder if a new provider would cover my gyno needs considering my recent experiences.

But let's assume they did - any suggestions on health care providers or plans? I currently use a PPO because I'm really partial to my endo and gyno. (As my friends know, I really wish my gyno was my best friend, but she's just not responding to my personal questions at the end of my medical emails. I guess inviting her to a BBQ might be a conflict of interest?)

Please, hook me up with some affordable insurance. Or get my husband a new job (in San Diego). Or let me know of someone who does cheap gender reassignment surgeries. Because being a man wasn't very fun, but it was economical.

12 comments:

Sarah Garner said...: My suggestion:

Go back to "being a man". Then call Oprah. Do you know how much money you could make in endorsements as a dude that has given birth to two babies?! Write a book, go on Larry King Live, maybe even Jerry Springer. Create your own clothing line. The possiblities are endless.

Then tell your insurance company to go to you-know-where, you won't need them anymore when you are a millionaire!; 8:45 AM
brookegfunk said...: Being a man does have perks like when ya dont want to shave you just call it a 5 o'clock shadow( sounds mysterious and spooky)and if ya need to scratch yer manly bits in public it's perfectly a-ok! My fave is the superhuman ablilty of men to tune out specific conversations like 'take out the trash' or 'dont forget to feed the kids'.As far as insurance goes being self employed with a bunch of kids means everything is expensive!; 9:16 AM
sara said...: Ugh. Health insurance is such a pain. We have pretty high premiums in this household too but we've figured out that over the years, with surgeries & births & twins & etc it has been worth it. I've never had an insurance carrier that I'm in love with though; I don't have any suggestions.; 10:49 AM
Young Family said...: Come teach school in Alpine School District in Utah. They pay every bit for you and your family. To have a baby all you pay is $100 dollars. Oh how I miss that insurance. Scott and this baby are way more expensive than Hayden (especially because we had double insurance so Joe's insuarance picked up the $100 and any copays for Hayden's checkups for the first six months
.); 11:13 AM
hilari said...: lets talk about what is really important, you moving anywhere six hours or less from me. i have a solution. move here, we'll start a business and let our hubbies do what they dream of, be stay at home dads.; 12:12 PM
Sarah S said...: I hate insurance issues. I had independent insurance for four years while working as a nanny - and my policy made me have maternity coverage for a year (paying that extra $$$$ each month for that privilege) before I would even be covered if I got pregnant. Ridiculous. Anyway, I was with Blue Cross. The coverage was pretty straightfoward, but definitely expensive. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this!!; 2:13 PM
Sarah S said...: And let me add one more thing - we had Eli on my independent insurance... one thing we didn't realize until AFTER he was born and we started getting bills - we not only had to meet my $1000 deductible, but Eli had a separate $1000 deductible once we added him on to my plan (once he was born) that included the cost of him staying at the hospital.

Let's just say his conception and his birth were NOT economical.; 2:14 PM
Capturing Joy with Kristen Duke said...: we use Altrua Healthshare and have done so for a year when my husbands company wouldn't pay for me and our 3kids. Ihear the maternity is great, but haven't used ityet. we pay $300 a month for our family. also doesn't pay a lotfor our dermatology extras so not sure how it'd pay with endocrinolgy. $800 a month is a lot!; 5:37 PM
Brenda said...: I know health insurances can really make mistakes - but changing the sex of a person is quite amazing! :); 8:29 AM
Laura and the family said...: I know I know sometimes covering the insurance does not make any senses. For example, almost all health insurances I know are willing to pay more than others: getting a Cochlear Implants (about $40,000-$60,000) while refusing to get a deaf person to get a pair of Behind Hearing aid $1,200. Isn't that a joke?; 9:32 AM
P Daddy said...: We had no insurance for your oldest sister's birth. Your second sister wasn't covered because she was born 9 1/2 months after I started work with Marriott and there was a 10-month waiting period for maternity coverage. But her extra day in the hospital for jaundice was covered because now she was an insured and that was under "well baby" coverage. I presume the extra $400 isn't just for maternity coverage but other GYN issues. Since I am essentially self-employed, we pay the full cost for your mother and me and it's at least $800 a month and that's not age-adjusted. Unfortunately, this year, we're going to recoup all the health insurance premiums we've paid for 35 years and then some, so you've got to do it until you find something better with no pre-existing condition exceptions or we become a first world nation and get universal health coverage (but then you might not get to pick your doctors without paying more).; 11:59 PM
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