musings and misadventures: HTT

10.09.2007

HTT - Baby Boy Edition

There are several reasons I'm glad that my Miss Dub is a girl. (And, no, I'm not sexist, it's just that I think all mothers are partial to whatever gender they get first. Now, get back in the kitchen, Mr. Dub!)

First, I loOove little girl clothes. So much so that I'm seriously hoping our next one is another girl so that I can call Miss Dub's extensive wardrobe an investment. Little boy stuff is improving, but can you beat a pink dress, matching cardigan and Mary Janes?

Second, I am a girl. I have girl parts. I do not know how to care for boy parts. Changing a boy diaper makes me a little nervous because I'm a little unsure of the proper wiping method for something I don't have myself.

Which brings me to our Hot Topic: Circumcision.

I'm not going to go into details here, people. Even though I am generally inappropriate, upfront and in-ya-face, I don't really want to give a lecture on foreskin. I think you all get the gist. In essence: To snip or not to snip?

I kind of always assumed we would if we have a boy, since our families did with their sons and since it seems to be a cultural norm among Americans - 60 percent opt for it, and that figure is even higher in the demographics we belong to.

But it's not medically necessary, though there are some benefits, like less likelihood of developing a urinary tracts infection and making said parts easier to clean. But the risk of a UTI for any male, circumcised or not, is less than one percent, and cleaning under the hood works just as well. So the perks are minimal.

Plus, it's kind of a painful experience, not to mention a pricey one. Lots of insurance companies don't cover the procedure any more, and most doctors don't encourage it, at least around here.

So I can't say what I'll ultimately decide if I ever produce male offspring. (And I hope I do, though did I mention how great little girls are?)

But what are your thoughts?

If you have boys, are they circumcised? How did you make that decision?

If you don't, how cute are little girl's clothes?

Like, totally, huh?

55 comments:

Laurel said...: Snip, snip, snip. Our insurance covers it, but even if they didn't we would pay the $300 to get it done. I think it is easier to clean and to be honest my DH insisted on it ('cause they get made fun of in gym without the snip).

The difference between little girl clothes and boys is this...girl clothes come as outfits...matching sweater, shirt, skirt, tights, shoes...boy clothes come in separates and you basically have to put them together. Unless you shop at Gymboree and then your kid looks like a mini metro sexual. There boy clothes are a little too matchy matchy for me...; 8:14 AM
Carina said...: I seriously considered not snipping, but DH insisted, like Laurel's DH. Even now, I have mixed feelings about it, especially when I read some of the New Testament passages. I'm not sure we did the right thing, but I have to rely on DH, since he's the one with the boy parts.

I love little girl clothes, but, as you began to point out, we have capital investment in boy things.

I think dressing a boy in a cute way is a challenge, one that I heartily accept. I am winning that challenge!; 8:46 AM
emily said...: I was petrified to have a boy.

After two girls (and a very extensive wardrobe--yes, I did the matchy-matchy thing) I didn't think I could even DO boy. Everything in our house is pink. And then there are the boy parts issues. And all the horror stories that people tell you about boys. And the fact that I have 3 brothers and have experienced boyness first hand.

But now that I have my little guy, I wouldn't trade him for the world. The boy clothes can even be a fun challenge. So maybe I felt some guilt about the circ for about 2 seconds but then it was done, and that's that.; 8:52 AM
stephanie said...: i think the boy has to be snipped if the dad is. i think they should look the same. i don't necessarily like the thought of it, but unfortunately i think it is a social must. my boy had his done when he was less then 24 hours old. the nurses told me he slept through the whole thing. but maybe they were just trying to make me feel better about it.

speaking of girl clothes, i have been in heaven getting mabel's old clothes out for stella. they are just so cute!; 9:12 AM
Kate said...: Amen to Laurel! I have heard that it looks 'wierd' if you don't have a circumcision... (what do I know?) All three of my boys were snipped... and they are fine- and BTW - no technical cleaning involved. After 3 boys- I now have a girl- and wiping her bum is more difficult... boys are simple!; 9:19 AM
Leslie said...: i thought we should circumcise our two boys, just because it's the cultural norm, and, like laurel said, you'd hate for them to be made fun of. i ultimately left the decision up to my husband. he agreed, we snipped. they numb them up and it's over so fast, i wasn't that concerned about it. our insurance didn't cover it, so we paid $350 both times. just a drop in the bucket for a c-section delivery, though!
as for boys and girls, as fun as girl clothes are and everything, i consider myself more of a "boy mom." i actually prefer not to have to deal with outfit choosing every morning. by the time kid number three is needing to be dressed, it's so easy to just grab a t-shirt and shorts out of the drawer and not worry about finding the matching hair clip.
plus, my boys are the sweetest, most cuddly little puppy dogs. and i loooove to hug them. i'm glad they love it, too.; 9:21 AM
Coco said...: I agree, just snip even though I have had problems with my sons (the ring got caught on a piece of the skin and we had to go to the Dr to get the ring off, now it looks like the Dr didn't snip enough underneath and there may be snip # 2 in the near future). Even with those I wouldn't change my mind about snipping, I just wouldn't use the hospital's Dr again, I would wait until we are out of the hospital and go to mine.

As for boys vs girls, I WANTED nothing more than a girl first, and boys clothes aren't as cute, but boys are great, especially when they asked from the backseat of the car to hold their mom's hand. It makes your heart melt.; 9:48 AM
Heather said...: snip, snip, snip. I agree that boys should look like their Dad. I have a family member who wasn't as a child and was teased his whole life. As an adult he needed to have it done for medical reasons and he said it was the worst pain ever. He has said he blames his mother for all those years of teasing that he experienced. Sad.

It's sad to see your little baby have a booboo but it goes away.

Boys clothes are boring but getting better. There is nothing better than a little girls wardrobe though. I love little dresses and tights.; 9:59 AM
Lindsey from The R House said...: they just talked about this on oprah and dr. oz went over the pros and cons for each.

very timely, mrs. dub.

our little guy went under the knife. we didn't really have a choice. his birthmother's mother (who is quite overbearing) said to us as we were leaving their house, "we are circumcising him, right?"

i asked some of the doctors about it at the hospital and they said that baby boys are so numbed up, that the procedure is done in the baby's sleep and they don't even flinch (the doctors and the babies).

i think steph is right. at least in R home we want R boys to look like their daddy ...in at least that area. heaven knows it might be the only area that they match in at the R house.; 10:43 AM
sara said...: Snip. It was never even a serious topic of discussion for us. My little guy was 5 hours old for his; they really got it over with quick! It heals fast & is no biggie. I agree about "matching" their dad.

Yes, girl clothes are darling but boys are easier in that you don't have to buy so many shoes! Boys can get away with one pair of tennis shoes, one pair of church shoes, and one pair of flip flops. I never feel like my girls have enough shoes... but at least with 3 girls, the shoes get a lot of wear.; 10:44 AM
Mandee said...: All of the boys in our house are snipped, and I have no regrets or concerns about it.

And cute boy clothes are much harder to find. Like Laurel said, you totally have to "create" the outfit instead of just picking it all up in one section of baby GAP.

But I love dressing my boys as much as I love dressing our teenage daughter. Now there's a topic for your next HTT. (Is the "legging" outfit that is all the rage this season ok to wear to church? I just know about that one!Or what about Prom dresses and tuxes the Sunday after the big dance?); 10:56 AM
Leisha Mareth said...: I have a son who we had circumcised at birth and a foster son who came to us uncircumcised. If we adopt our foster son we will be circumcising him! It is easier to clean, just looks better and I think all the men in the family should "match". My oldest brother and his wife chose not to circumcise their 4 boys (but they also had their children at home, home-schooled and eat lots of grains and garlic to cure what ails 'em!) I kid, I kid, no one get their dander up!; 11:17 AM
Leisha Mareth said...: P.S. Girl clothes ROCK!; 11:18 AM
Anonymous said...: No snip. It's Male Genital Mutilation, nothing more. Looking like daddy, like other boys, etc, are ridiculous reasons to lose half the skin and 3/4 of the sensitivity from your genitals. In Canada, circumcision is rare. In Europe, it's rare. 85% of men in the world get to keep their "original factory specifications", and the circ rate has fallen so low in the USA that it's really no longer "normal" even here (varies by region).

You don't need to be scared to give birth to a beautiful baby boy. You are absolutely doing the right thing by not mutilating him, even if it happened to daddy, uncle, grandfather, or even older brother. Dr. Dean Edell circumcised his first three boys before he realized the mistake he made, left his fourth intact, and talks about why boys shouldn't circumcised on his radio show.

Some good resources:

MAC
NOCIRC; 11:23 AM
Anonymous said...: Like Elaine on Seinfeld said an uncircumsized puno has, and I Quote "No Face, No Personality" I wanted my boys to have personality where ever they could.; 11:24 AM
hilari said...: i say, just snip that thing off. those things just look better without a turtleneck on. maybe that is just because i live in arizona where you don't really ever need turtlenecks. i also once had a lady tell me that i had mutilated my then three week old's genitals. nice. by the way, i think i got the expenisive circ's - $450.; 11:32 AM
zeeny said...: Random that my husband and I discussed this last night as we went to bed. (Great bed time conversation don't you think?) He insisted on snipping. I guess I havn't researched it out but he said he's the one with the unit and should have more of a say in the procedure since he has the part. He was sort of teasing but I think he was also pretty serious!; 11:32 AM
Anonymous said...: i think i might agree with the other anonymous comment. we've established that people circumcise their boys because it's the social norm, and for no other reason... so what's the point? don't we need to let this norm die out if there really isn't any real purpose? and (hopefully this isn't too graphic) i've actually read that circumcision lowers a man's sexual pleasure... and i know in other countries (i think only underdeveloped ones) they cut off part of a girl's, er, anatomy, but thank goodness they don't in the u.s.

i don't know what i'm going to do when i have boys, but i can't see myself doing something like that to my kid if the only benefits are, "it looks better" or "he needs to look like daddy." my parents didn't circumcise my three brothers, and they've never said they've been made fun of. (then again, would they really tell me?? :); 11:35 AM
Anonymous said...: p.s. dr. oz said that a circ. can also help prevent sexually transmitted diseases, including hpv. boo, yah, on it not being good for anything.; 11:50 AM
Anonymous said...: LOL about the turtleneck in AZ, Hilari!; 11:51 AM
tara said...: I have heard that what the second anon. said is true, less pleasure for the man with the circumcision. However-- I once knew a family that came from a country where it was not the social norm to circumcise the boys. 2 of their three boys ended up getting circumcised within their first year of life b/c it's not as easy to clean the other way around and they had infections that were more painful than being circumcised in the first place. So... I think there are some hygiene benefits to it as well. As for me and my house, if we ever have boys, we'll circumcise. I might also add... having had 3 girls, and having changed a few boy diapers... MUCH easier!; 11:54 AM
Anonymous said...: 8===>, 8===Q, 8===P AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HOW DO I MAKE AN UNCIRCUMSIZED PENIS EMOTICON?!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?; 12:34 PM
Jack Attack said...: to snip...no question about it. Before I had my little guy, my husband and I both agreed that our boys would have this procedure. I worked in a pediatric and family pracitce office for 5 years and assisted the doctor many times. Most moms worried that it hurt the baby, but this is not the case. A topical cream and local anesthetic are applied and the baby is crying b/c their legs are tied down. Many times, I had babies fall asleep during the procedure. They heal within a week and it looks so much better and makes cleaning a lot easier.

I also saw older male patients who were not and wanted the procedure done, as well as parents of 3-5 year olds who changed their minds (this is cruel if you ask me...the pain and recovery is a lot worse the older a patient gets).

I prefer boys...I only want boys. I have found cute clothes for Jack and love dressing him like a little man. I can only imagine if we had a girl, we would be poor. Plus, I don't have to do his hair (I am horrible at that kind of stuff).; 12:35 PM
janaya said...: i tend to agree it's pretty dumb that we do it because it's a social norm. but so was getting my ears pierced, and so is wearing a fatty diamond wedding ring, and so is strapping on a pair of murderously painful high-heels. of course, not all of those things require physical pain... but there's plenty we do because they are cultural norms. and i think that's ok for a lot of things. especially if there are SOME benefits.

plus, if the whole mormon thing turns out to be wrong, at least we have a back-up plan, right? ;)

kidding. kidding.; 12:36 PM
Anonymous said...: You mean, a man could actually have MORE sexual pleasure??! Two nights a week is already killing me!

Circumcise, circumcise, circumcise.; 12:50 PM
Melanie M. McKinnon said...: my dad is a doctor. here is a story from him:

"a 19 year old boy came into my office and had an unidentified problem (sometimes they don't like to tell the nurses which is fine).

he was getting ready to go on his lds mission and for some unknown reason he thought he needed to be circumcised for it. he hadn't been when he was a baby and honestly wanted to be his entire life but didn't feel comfortable talking to his parents about it.

he decided to circumcise himself."

i guess he'd actually done a good job but the kid did this with NO medication. my dad could not imagine the pain and the kid said it hurt so bad he passed out.

imagine his life up until that point!
-
when my son gus was born, his foreskin had not grown all the way and couldn't get a circ in the hospital because they weren't sure what was wrong.

i was so scared he would be made fun of in the locker room if we didn't get it taken care of so i took him to a urologist as soon as i could.

he would have needed surgery after he turn 6 mo and it would have turned out fine, i assume, as it could have been another problem they couldn't identify.

boys locker rooms are my biggest fear. that's why i am in favor of snipping as young as possible.; 1:09 PM
Ilene said...: I'm with Jessica, circumcised guys seem to do just fine in the pleasure department.

My boys were born in hippieville, Eugene, Oregon. I swear the pediatrician gave us a fifteen minute talk and made us read some stuff before the procedure. I couldn't see any benefits of not circumcising to circumcision. Ultimately, I didn't want my boy to be what was described in the literature as a "social trailblazer." When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in the USA, snip.

Can't see what the downside of circumcising is, really. If God said it was okay to hack it off in one point in time it must mean that isn't really a truly useful part, right? Besides, I know too many people in the medical field who say things can get pretty foul down there. I know little boys have trouble brushing their teeth and those are body parts that are seen every day.

Boys are WAY easier to clean up than girls. However, newborn boys are far more dangerous in the changing diaper department.; 1:13 PM
Jacy said...: I'm pregnant with #3, our first boy and this is a big topic of discussion at the moment. My DH is adamantly opposed to the idea, but I had always considered it a given.

After a lot of research (and I mean A LOT), it seems like comes down to mostly cosmetics, whether that be to look like dad, to avoid getting teased in gym class or because that is the social norm. I'm don't know that I'm the best one to make that type of decision for him, even if he is my son.

I'm not sure what we'll end up doing. I just don't want to do it for personal/selfish reasons.; 1:43 PM
Colleen said...: Snip. I read up on it, but never seriously considered NOT doing it. I figure that's what Daddy looks like, so that's what my boys are going to look like.

(Every store has 3x as much girl clothes as boy clothes. I can't wait to have a girl!); 1:50 PM
Rachie said...: I am glad today's subject is about penises...my favorite subject!!!

We are major snippers. We snipped our little guy because he needs to look like dad and the rest of the boys his age.

In fact, we have a friend who was not snipped as a baby. When he was in his 20s he voluntarily went in to be snipped. Mind you, it is a much bigger deal to snip at 20 years than 2 days old.

The reason he did it was because he was made fun of his whole life.; 1:52 PM
liz said...: I am fascinated that so many people are so adamant about circumcising, because it is truly becoming more and more common not to, since it is not a medical necessity. I am also fascinated that those who are opposed to it felt their comments needed to be anonymous!

I won't judge you if you circumcise your boys, but my three boys are intact. We read a lot, discussed a lot, and didn't think it was necessary, especially since we are the only industrialized nation in which it is the norm. Not to snip is becoming so common now in the U.S., that I'm pretty sure my kids won't be the lone "turtlenecks" in the locker room.

They don't look like their dad, and I don't think anyone cares one bit. And he teaches them about keeping clean, so we hope no one will weather any infections, etc. I suppose if this really bothers any of them, they can get snipped later in life, when it will be their own choice.

Just FYI, we are not that earthy -- don't eat organic, don't give birth at home, don't home school, etc. I did laugh when I read Janaya's comment, since I don't happen to have my ears pierced, wear a fat diamond ring, nor wear painful high heels. On second thought, maybe I'm a little earthy :); 2:04 PM
Kristen said...: Okay enough of the SNIPPING comments! Every time I read the word "snip" I am feeling a little pain and I don't even have "one". I have 3 boys and they have all been circumcised. I think they look very weird without but maybe that's because it's what I'm used to. Enough said! On to the girl clothes..after 3 boys I had a girl and needless to say I am in HOG HEAVEN! I feel like I am playing dolls everyday and I have to admit..doing her hair is my favorite time of day. And wiping? I am still freaked out about wiping up inside her little you know what! Believe me a penis is much easier to wipe because you don't have to go inside anything. p.s. thanks for the response to my sister amy's email today! It was great!; 2:05 PM
Anonymous said...: Janaya's comment was great! We snipped son, wished we hadn't. So sad. The dr. made us sign a paper saying that we were doing this voluntarily, the only benefits were less chance of a UTI and social reasons. My bros aren't, my sis in law says that the increased pleasure, ahem, is for the WOMAN not the man, and they go at it like rabbits... sorry for the inappropriateness, but just tellin ya what I know.

As for clothes, girls clothes are cuter, but more expensive for the cute stuff. You can find cute CHEAP boys stuff anywhere like Walmart, but Wally worlds girl stuff is hardly ever cute or never fits right.; 2:06 PM
Angy said...: i don't have kids yet... but i always assumed that if i had boys i would get them snipped. i think i've just heard more pros than cons in doing it... and it seemed like the obvious choice. to me... of course!; 2:09 PM
liz said...: I just have to agree with Kristen that wiping boys is way easier. But, I disagree that un-snipped boys look weird. It's what you're used to -- the circumcised ones look weird to me. One of my boys' cousins saw their intact parts one day and said "Mom, he looks like a heffalump!"; 2:13 PM
Anonymous said...: have you seen an uncircumcised yoo-hoo? enough said. snip, snip, even if costs a bit!; 2:28 PM
Cichelli said...: Isn't this the same group of women who a few HTT back said (the majority, at least) that they were against plastic surgery because it was superficial? Without a medical reason, isn't this similar?

Anyway, I left the decision up to my husband because I'm a girl and don't have much of an opinion. Out of him and his brothers, 1/2 are circed and 1/2 are not. He is and wanted his boys circumcised. I didn't have much of an opinion. So we circumcised both boys. His call.

I'm grateful I have boys because I would spend THOUSANDS of dollars on little girl clothes, and with boys I hardly spend anything.

But I was very glad we had our two boys back to back, and in the same seasons, so we can do hand me downs. That is a perk for sure.

But I would love a girl someday because I need someone to take to musicals and dance class and shopping. I swear, if my third is a boy, I'm making him the gay son.; 3:05 PM
Laurie said...: There was no question if we would "snip" our boy. My DH also insisted so that both of their parts would be the same. I did insist though that my DH be there to support our boy during the procedure. Our doc did a beautiful job and I am glad we did it.

Since I have a boy first. I actually have had so much fun looking for cute boy clothes. I love the challenge and I can spot them quickly. Now that I am pregnant with a little girl, shopping is a bit overwhelming. There are so many cute girl clothes that I feel like I am going around in circles. I will find my kniche and what I like best but for now I am surrounded by cuteness.; 3:22 PM
Kate said...: BTW- now that I have a girl (after 3 boys) the clothes are so fun! I think she has more clothes in her short seven months on earth than all my boys do combined (in their lifetimes!); 4:04 PM
Morgan said...: i say snip. it's so not a big deal. it heals very fast and i don't remember my little guy every being in pain by it. easier to clean, same as daddy, looks normal (to me anyway), less infection, etc etc.

so i am pregnant with our second, I wanted a girl sooo bad. Although I love dressing my boy like a handsome little dude, i just can't resist looking at the girl clothes with longing. but alas, it is another boy, and i got over not being able to buy girl clothes pretty fast. i LOVE boys, i really can't even hardly imagine having a girl, although i hope i do someday. but i wouldn't mind having all or mostly boys. plus, i tell my husband quite often how lucky he is that we don't have girls, as i would spend sooo much money on clothes.; 4:21 PM
Anonymous said...: J. said "I'm don't know that I'm the best one to make that type of decision for him, even if he is my son."

J., I think your instincts are correct here. Since it's cosmetic and medically unnecessary, the right person to decide if he wants it is your son, once he's informed and able to decide.

Colleen said "I figure that's what Daddy looks like, so that's what my boys are going to look like."

Colleen, your son's penis will NOT look like his fathers, because they are all different. A pre-pubescent boy's penis will never look like his father's anyway, for obvious reasons. Cosmetic surgery on a baby? Doesn't something sound wrong about that?

RACHIE said "We snipped our little guy because he needs to look like dad and the rest of the boys his age."

RACHIE, don't you mean that's how YOU needed him to look, for some reason? If the real concern were what HE needed, you'd let him make his own choice. Maybe what HE will need is the whole body he was born with.

liz said "...my three boys are intact. ... They don't look like their dad, and I don't think anyone cares one bit."

liz, isn't is strange that people would think anyone cares about this? Sure, kids will always tease each other about something, no matter what. But unlike circumcision, they grow out of it.

Angy said "i don't have kids yet... but i always assumed that if i had boys i would get them snipped."

Angy, wouldn't it be best to try to avoid surgery on a baby, if possible?

loudaisy said "My DH also insisted so that both of their parts would be the same."

loudaisy, I think leaving it up to someone else is wrong. It's a mother's job to protect her baby as much as the father's.

---

I'm really surprised so many posts here favor unnecessary surgery that reduces sensitivity of your child's sex organ. I guess it's just what a lot of people are used to, but quite fortunately, that is changing. The circ rate in the US has fallen to about 50%, and will surely keep falling.; 5:25 PM
Amy said...: Gosh, I thought I really wanted a boy after THREE girls, but again after all the snip, snip talk I'm not sure! I have had a BLAST dressing girls, but ther are EXPENSIVE!!!!!! But thats how I made so much money with my garage sale. Little Miss Dub is so...darling.; 5:26 PM
SAHMmy Says said...: I attended the circumcision of my son when he was about a week old. It was horrible, but in our region it's the norm, and I didn't want him to have any issues being "different" when he's older. I totally understand that different cultures and religions have a different point of view, and really it does seem barbaric on its face. Still, I'd do it again if I had another boy, and I'd stay with him as well during the procedure.; 5:43 PM
lyn said...: Wow. I'm surprised at how many people make the decision without actually doing any research about it!! My first son is circ'd. I did not research and followed the Mormon herd. I WILL NOT circ future sons. My husband agrees with me. There is no medical reason to, and actually quite a bit of evidence out that it is better for boys to stay intact. Short of that, it would have to be a religious reason to do it....last time I checked, current LDS doctrine DOES NOT have us living under Mosaic law....

Honestly, how many fathers go around whipping their penis's out around their boys? My dad never did. He was incredibly modest and I don't know that my brothers ever saw him - I certainly never did. My husband is modest as well - I don't know that my son would be able to know whether his dad is circ'd or not.

My son and I actually had this conversation the other day - he is in kindergarten now and noticed one of his friends looked different than him (while in the bathroom). We had a conversation about it and he was okay with it. That will probably be the last conversation we have about it....unless I have another boy...; 6:11 PM
Anonymous said...: SAHMmy Says, how can you recognize it's "barbaric", see one and verify that it's "horrible," and then go on to say you would do that to your son because "in our region it's the norm"???? I am just astounded.

Didn't you learn during your own childhood that even if everyone else jumps off a cliff, that doesn't mean you need to follow?; 6:23 PM
Anonymous said...: some of you are kooks.; 8:16 PM
Mrs. Dub said...: i honestly don't know where to start. i've laughed, mused and pondered over these comments so thanks to everyone who's contribute.

although i must say it is strange, albeit familiar, that the most adamant folks are anonymous. (even ones who are calling out others by name for their viewpoints.)

if you really believe what you're saying - and i think you do - why the secrecy?

i'm just curious.; 9:29 PM
P Daddy said...: What with periods, cramps, labor, episiotomies, and mammograms, I guess you're entitled to discuss this topic so clinically, but I find it painful to read. Makes me really feel for Abraham and Timothy. Hopefully your little boys will never need the protection, but circumcision dramatically reduces incidence of HIV and HPV as well as UTIs. Still, the American Academy of Pediatricians takes a neutral stance. In part because circs do get botched and they can have complications. Arguments against focus on believed psychological and sexual harms that are less susceptible of hard evidence than the pro arguments regarding hygiene and disease. Tradition and parental preference may not be scientific, but that doesn't make them irrelevant. As long as there are urinals and locker rooms, little boys will know what their fathers' and other boys' equipment looks like, but, as mentioned by others, with or without is only one of many differences in appearance. Besides, I don't think anyone would advocate late teen boob jobs just to make sure little Janie looks like Mom. For all that, I'm in the cut camp.; 10:12 PM
Amber (EyesofAmber) said...: I have three boys and they are all circumcised. I did a lot of reading and researching, and we're fairly "earthy", though I prefer the term granola...lol. We had the boys in hospitals, but decided to go au natural with the last birth. We homeschool, use natural remedies whenever possible and eat as much organic as we can. One of the major issues to me was that our boys look like their dad. My boys have all seen their dad use the bathroom, something we felt to be a vital part of their potty training. They've also been with him using public restrooms and such. My oldest looks just like me, the other two look like their Dad and he is always trying to find parts of his appearance that resemble his dad. I think it does make a difference to them.

I totally understand all the arguments against. I have friends and relatives who chose not to and I have no problem with that. Hubby and I made a decision together after research and prayer. We had minor complications with the first two, just from poor technique. Our regular pediatrician did my youngest son and he hasn't had the slightest bit of trouble and was practically healed before we came home.

I didn't want my sons to have some problem down the road that would cause them to have to be circumcised, a procedure which I believe can require general anesthesia in an adult male. I have a friend who has one of each, not by choice. Her oldest was left, then her second son was born with a birth defect that required the use of his foreskin for reconstructive surgery, so he looks like he was circumcised. I think it's ultimately a decision that you have to feel comfortable with. You should be able to discuss the reasons for your choice with your son when he is older, either way you choose.; 10:38 PM
Charlotte said...: How do they measure reduced sensitivity? I mean, once it's done, even if you alter it (which I understand can be done) it wouldn't really be the same. And an adult who decided to be snipped later would of course have reduced sensitivity. Get my point? I don't think they really "know" if that is a side effect. And if it is, I've never met a man who wished he had more sensitivity. Without being crude, I would think that might affect longevity of erection.
And as for me... the way it looks definitely affects my level of attraction.; 11:02 PM
Anonymous said...: This is probably more information than you want, but since the subject has been brought up, I must add. I've done it with both- there is NOT a difference in pleasure for the woman.; 11:04 PM
Anonymous said...: This topic just came up with a group of my girlfriends. All 3 of us married to men born outside of the us and not circumcised. My husband went to school here in the USA and it was not an issue for him in gym or otherwise. Now that we are expecting our first I am sure we will come to a decision soon but my inclination is that we will not circumcise (assuming the baby is a boy).

The reason for the secrecy is certainly not the fact that I do "it" with someone that is uncircumcised. It's that no one knows yet that we are pregnant!; 4:23 PM
Queen Elizabeth said...: I've never commented before - I don't know you at all (blog surfing let me to your blog) - but now I HAVE to comment. I know someone VERY WELL (who shall remain nameless) that is FEMALE and her HUSBAND is NOT circumcised and she has suffered for YEARS and YEARS of almost constant yeast infections. So, if you're not gonna *snip* for the boy, do it for the girl who will enter their lives later!!!
(I saw this on Oprah and Dr. Oz said it didn't matter if they did or didn't and I wanted to scream "WHAT ABOUT THE AFFECT ON WOMEN!?!" but I didn't so PLEASE spread the word. This person's gynecologist even said that research is showing this to be common....; 11:01 AM
Anonymous said...: Very interesting that most of those who don't snip leave their comments anon. Some have even gotten a little "snippy".

As for me....I will snip my boys.

And my reason? Because I WANT TO.; 7:10 PM
Anonymous said...: ashby, "because I want to" sounds awfully arbitrary when the normal sexual function of another human being is on the line. But you can hardly be blamed for that entirely, since it basically mirrors the position taken by the American medical establishment, which is that there doesn't need to be any medical reason to perform penis reduction surgery on a perfectly healthy infant.

Should we just be grateful there is only one type of cosmetic surgery routinely performed in America on perfectly healthy, normal babies for no medical reason whatsoever, instead of more than one? At least girls are safe.

Now if only it could be one that was less sexually damaging.; 11:17 PM