Not so much my dream houseYou know how people are baby hungry? (Like me, every other day, interspersed with thinking, "Two kids is the dumbest idea since Lunchables!")
Well, I'm HOUSE hungry. Like, I get a warm, cozy feeling when I think of walls that can be painted, parking spaces that aren't shared and roofs without neighbors clomping around above. I get a little sweaty when I drive past "For Sale" signs. I get a little giddy when I walk into someone else's newly remodeled digs. And I totally, totally stalk the real estate listings in hopes of finding my dream house.
Unfortunately, my dream house and my real budget are two different things. (I mean, who doesn't want a modern ranch house overlooking a beach?) But even my realistic self can't find anything within our price range that doesn't require commuting from Iowa or selling Miss Dub on the black market. And I can't decide which would be worse.
I know, I know, the market is crashing, but it would take a long fall to accommodate our needs. It's not that we're poor. (I actually don't know the definition of poor, but I don't think my Target habit fits the description.) It's just that houses around here aren't cheap. And we're not willing to move out to the boonies to buy an affordable tract house because face time with Mr. Dub is more important to us than a bonus room. (What the heck is a bonus room, anyway?)
Also, student loan debt sucks. Especially when your husband decides to go to a prestigious, private university where his quarterly tuition cost more than my entire college education. Combined with tithing (paying 10 percent of our income to our church), we're already paying out what amounts to a mortgage payment ... and we're still renting a TWO bedroom apartment!
It's times like these that I wish for a real estate fairy. (Heaven knows that SFG is good for nothing!) Someone who could tip her wand at a listing and magically reduce the asking price by a couple hundred thousand. But I've yet to find one, despite all the wishing on stars I do each night. And when I carry around a magic wand, I tend to get strange looks. (Also when I wear an outfit that I think looks hip, only to realize that I look like a hostess at a Mexican restaurant. Seriously, it happened to me the other day - at a Mexican restaurant!)
Anyway, I'm not really sure if I'm venting or looking for advice or secretly hoping someone has the number of a good fairy and/or real estate agent.
I'm just saying that I thought by 28 I'd be a homeowner. Then again, I also thought I'd have five kids. And that's the dumbest idea since Squeeze-its.
What about you? When did you become a homeowner?
And how did you decide on your home?
34 comments:
see, that's where we're different... i like squeeze its and lunchables. i bet that you could afford a piso in alicante, but that wouldn't solve the loud neighbors, parking or commuting problems you mentioned, but you wouldn't have to sell precious lil miss dub on the black market!
Our first house: Let's see, we were both 24, it was built in 1908 and needed a ton of work. We didn't realize how much work that would be. Naivete is the gift of youth, or possibly in this case a curse.
We lived in a constant mess for 3 years and worked like dogs. Did I mention we were young, dumb, and physically healthy. All requirements needed. When we moved everyone was like, "Oh...aren't you so sad to be leaving your house?" My answer? "NO! It's like getting rid of 1000 lbs I've been carrying around my neck!"
But we did make some money that allowed us to be in our great house now. Was it worth it? That is a hesitant "Yes."
mrs. dub, I'm not a homeowner yet either, but I too have got the itch. Lately I have taken to dreaming up my ideal floor plan (as the house we live in now is possibly the worst set up in the world...split level) and I think about it all the time. I even spent part of conference doodling...how awful! but you know what? foreclosures are at an all time high right now. you need to find an agent that specializes in that kind of thing. then the only trick is finding a house that you love that just happens to be on "clearance"!
or, go with laurels plan and buy and foreclosure that works for awhile then sell it and make some money for the house of your dreams!
We bought our first condo in Provo (closed on it right before we got married). We paid $90,500 for it and had a very spacious 2 bedroom place with a nice living room, kitchen, large dining room, 2 bathrooms... the complex had a pool, tennis courts, hot tub, etc., and our monthly homeowner's fee was minimal. We were only in it for 18 months, and sold it for $96,000 FSBO, so we made minimal profit.
When we came out here for grad school, we got a good deal (FSBO) on a condo that needed some cosmetic improvements on the inside, and over the last 5 years have painted most of the walls and had the bathroom remodeled. However, our taxes are atrocious and the only amenity our place has is a nice grassy area out front (really just the city golf course) and a courtyard with a community grill. And we pay three times as much for our homeowner's fee each month. Our current place is a tiny 2 bedroom (the second bedroom is actually a dining room with doors and closets), with no parking included and an obnoxious barking dog above us. Our condo building has an abundance of single older women, many of whom like to smoke - in the courtyard - so the smoke wafts into our place when the windows are open.
All I can say is... I have the itch for a house, but definitely feel your pain in that it's just not possible with a normal salary, even with an advanced degree! (which is so frustrating!) Most people around here have two incomes to afford their house. Oh well...
We bought our first house right when my hubbie started law school because we knew we would be living in the same place for 3 years. I was sooo excited to have our own house, but of course we had to buy a 35 year old bare bones house. Since our mortgage took our every last penny we didn't have anything left over to put into making the house cute or more comfortable. I learned my lesson, we called that house our practice house. While owning the house was sort of like a forced savings account, we were so excited to be done with it. So, my point is, while you may think it would be fun to own a house, don't spread yourself so thin that you can't make it into the home you were dreaming of. Otherwise, you are stuck freezing in an old house with inefficient heat without the money to be able to turn the heater on.
This might make you feel better...
We just bought our first home in May. I'm 30 & Q is 29. We had 2 kids with another on the way. I really thought we'd be homeowners sooner, but Q went to law school, and then we waited until he had been working with a well established income for a while. I hear ya on the student loans...
The only nice thing about waiting for a while is that we are in a fairly big home that we won't have to move out of for a while (if ever). We sort of skipped the "starter home" phase.
We got our first house a few years back when we were 26. A cute, new little randcher in Eugene, Oregon before the market sky rocketed. It is all about timing. We sold it not three years later for $60,000 profit and that is when the market was slow. I don't say this to brag but to give you hope that timing is everything. When the time is right it will happen. We now live in a bigger home in Spokane, Washington because the real estate is cheaper here. Love that.
Every time I visit my parents in Chicago-land, I think "I could live here." Great museums, symphony, downtown... That is until I look at the home prices and the astronomical property taxes. We always end up flying back west.
I became a home owner the same month we got married... at 26. My husband was 34. And it was a good house with the best neighbors in the best neighborhood.
Then we had more kids, and house started shrinking, and the street we were on became busier, and I thought it was time to move.
So we moved into a bigger house- a better house- in a more "desired" location.
And I really miss my old neighbors, and friends, and neighborhood.
So, I'm here to say... it's not about the house. It's about the neighbors and neighborhood!
We just became homeowners last week and it's pretty crazy. We haven't moved in yet so it still doesn't feel like we own the home. (Which I guess we won't own it for many years.) It's in a new neighborhood so I'm a little worried about what neighbors will move in but all in all we're really excited. The thing that's hit me the most about getting a house though, is that I feel WAY more poor now than we ever did renting an apartment. Kind of scary but I guess we'll get used to it.
...I feel more poor just because it's a bigger commitment.
Ben and I bought a condo/townhome at ages 23/25. I thought it was going to be perfect for us. But add one baby and the house seemed way too small.
This past February we traded up at the ages of 25/27) and bought a darling bungalow in the Holladay area of SLC. It was built in 1945 but has been updated by previous owners. It's perfect for us and has a huge yard, great for the boys to run in or expand our home.
I agree-it's about the neighborhood. We LOVE our area, our neighbors and the home. I love being a home owner. But we can afford SLC. I couldn't be a home owner in NYC or DC or San Francisco or San Diego. It just works that we're in Utah.
So there's your trade off. You can have a darling bungalow, perfect to raise your kids... but you'll be raising them in Utah...
so i'm almost 30 and still renting. but i'm ok with that (for now). everyone and their dog tried to convince us that "you HAVE to buy a house, otherwise you're just throwing your money away!" but we sat down with an accountant and ran the numbers. it doesn't always work that way. i promise! we have saved SO much money by keeping our rent low and living with one car. we've put what would have gone to equity (but most interest) into the stock market and made MUCH more than we would have in the real estate market. i just say this to put in a plug for weighing your options. we'll be moving to DC soon and suddenly jumping from the $200K market to the $500K market... and 20% on half a million, is a LOT of money to put down (unless we live in a shack... which is looking very possible. haha). but... the more you put down, the less you'll pay for your house in the long run. the most disturbing thing i ever realized was that when you buy a house with a regular 30 year mortgage, you end up paying for your home more than twice by the time you're done. people argue equity, etc etc... but i don't care, that's just crazy! :) so, just be careful not to get sucked in by those people who loudly proclaim "you're throwing your money away on rent!!" because it's just as easy (if not easier) to throw your money away on interest and a bad real estate deal.
though, painting walls sounds brilliant!
sorry... just so i'm not misunderstood... i'm all for buying a house. just be careful. :)
I hear you! I guarantee we pay more in rent than most in mortgage...oh the good life in Southern Cali. I am currently dreaming about this house for sale on our same street...I am obsessed, but dh reminds me that it is not going to happen. One day!
what in the world are "squeez-its"?
Houses are great- if you like if like the feeling of living paycheck to paycheck. You'll get there soon enough, but until then try not to put too much pressure on Mr.Dub.
-David
I thought at 31 I'd be a homeowner. Oh the joys of living in California. I can totally relate to everything you posted and just wanted to say that I feel your pain, sista.
I am FEELING your pain. We are renting (also in the Chicagoland area). We found a great place that was purchased as an investment property about 10 years ago. Needless to say, we would buy in a heartbeat... except our mortgage and taxes would be almost twice and much as our rent.
Honestly, Mrs. Dub, I don't know how all of these Chicagoland'ers have enough money to buy a house. My husband and I both work. We both make good money. We only have one small car payment. (And a minor fortune in student loans) And, we cannot see purchasing anywhere reasonable for another couple of years.
HGTV seems to be crying out every night, so let me know if you figure out the solution.
Oh, Mrs. Dub...I could write an essay about this. But i have to go right now, so I'll be back...or maybe I"ll just e.mail you...I have THAT much to say about it :)
Oh Mrs. Dub, i can feel your pain. Living here in the DC area can make you feel poorer than the poorest. $500000 will only buy a 10yr old townhome. It's sad. It will happen for you. The big secret around here is foreclosed homes. It will happen.
Hey, squeezits are awesome. at least they were to me before I had kids squirting them on my parents' white carpet. :)
Rob and I bought a house when we were first married and thought it would be great to start out without wasting money on rent. It was great and perfect for right then.
Our lives took quie a few different turns and the house was turning into such a burden once we moved out and started renting it out.
We got SO lucky after 2 years of trying to sell it to have an investor buy it from us. And we actually made a great profit because the location was so good.
We've been living in an apartment since then and I still LOVE not paying a mortgage. No more panicking that my credit will plummit if the check is a day late and no more worrying about the price going up, as it did.
I LOVE renting right now. And someday I will want a house.
Just not until I have totally forgotten what it feels like to have an entire file cabinet filled with mortgage outlines and escrow information that I'm expected to understand and comment on at a moments notice.
Yuck.
I know that feeling of longing for a house! We bought our first home a little over 3 years ago and before we bought it, I remember daydreaming about a house all the time. I started becoming unhappy with just renting and wanting more and feeling jealous, etc. I forced myself to stop feeling that way…but it was hard! Our old apartment was right in the middle of downtown, across the street from a grocery store, within walking distance of the library, post office, craft stores, etc. I remember taking my baby (now 4 y.o) in his stroller and just walking and doing all my errands. Now, in our house, we live in a hilly, rural area (with no sidewalks) which makes it difficult to take out the stroller and go anywhere. Plus, we are not close to any stores (I still like my house). I look back and remember how happy I really was, even though I maybe didn’t realize it at the time. Plus, painting the walls wasn’t as fun as I thought it would be! I guess what I am trying to say is that there are trade-offs for both.
Another thing: for us, the Realtor was the key. We ended up firing our first and with our second realtor, the whole house hunting experience was so much smoother and easier.
I want a modern ranch on the beach.
I'll take a modern ranch just about anywhere.
We own our condo, but it's not the same as a house. We bought when I was 23 and have lived there ever since.
I cruise neighborhoods looking for houses. I scour the real estate listings online. I know the asking price of just about every home that’s been sold in the past 4 hours in our town. I am OBSESSED. I am so obsessed about getting the right house at the right price that I turned down several homes for prices that I now think were rock bottom bargains.
I even tried to buy a dream house, but the sale failed a couple times.
It got so bad that I had to stop looking cold turkey because it was stressing me out.
But now the signs are up all around the ‘hood and I’m giving into those casa cravings.
I was married and 23 ... My husband came with a house. I was very lucky. We lived in an apartment for the 1st time last Spring while living in corporate housing. A little backwards, I know.
Currently, our house is the size of the basement in our Utah house. We would love more space (i.e. a basement full of toys).
I hope you find something soon! Preferably by me :)
We bought our first "starter" house, THEN my husband decided to go for his master's at a "private, prestigious college where tuition cost more than my entire college education" (including a year towards a master's degree!) However, the upside of that? That degree will eventually pay off in more ways than one and your house lust will turn into paint decisions (we've been in our 2nd house 2 years and the walls STILL aren't painted, I CAN'T DECIDE!)
We bought our house in 2002 when we were 23/25. And I cried the first night there! We just wanted to get into a house so bad that it didn't matter that the house was pretty much hideous. It was the size, location, and price that we wanted. We spent 5 years and about $50K changing everything. I am SO glad that we bought when we did...before prices went crazy high. We ended up selling it just last month and made more money than we even paid for it. And NOW, at ages 28/30 we are in pretty much our dream home. Rather than crying the first night in my new house, I kept saying, "I can't believe we live here!"
Don't worry, Mrs. Dub. You'll own a home soon. But home ownership is so much WORK! Enjoy not having to deal with landscaping, pool, and other maintenence issues/expenses while you don't own. It can be SUCH a hassle!
Sorry. I didn't mean to sound like I was bragging about my house situation. Just answering your questions...
i am currently sitting in a bonus room.
and as i look around i see...
a large room with two couches, a tv and a fake palm tree.
so i guess its a playroom.
but we've never been able to shake the "bonus room" title.
i dont know why...but it just sounds weird to even call it a playroom.
yikes.
My husband and I bought a fixer-upper in the 'hood when I was 23 and he was 26. We worked hard on that house and after 6 years it finally was up to my standards of living, but it was still in the wrong part of town. So now we live in the right part of town (luckily we live in the most affordable place in the world) with the 1980s house that STILL needs some fixing up to reach my standards, but at least we don't have to deal with lead paint and drug dealers.
But--now that I live in my "ideal" house, you know, the one I always pictured myself in, it's not that fun. I don't have much to look forward to, I've reached the top and it's all downhill now, I'm a grown up now. My conclusion: I think the anticipation is the best part (cue Carly Simon), plus it takes the least work...
I say- live it up in the big city while you can! What an exciting time. We bought our first home (total dump in a great neighborhood) fixed it up as much as we could with our own hands- and sold it for what we thought was sooo.. much- until about 2 years later it went up 250%... (California real estate is crazy!) We have owned 3 homes in our marriage- and my theory is; The breakdown of what matters is 20% house and 80% neighborhood... And I do believe, when the time is right, and if you are making the right sacrifices- there is a 'real estate fairy' who exists and all those secret wishes in your head will come true! It did for me... I wanted three things; 1. to live in a cul-de-sac 2. walking distance to the elementary school 3. great friends and neighbors... all of my wishes came true!
My husband and I bought our first house after 10 years of marriage (school, starting our own business, etc. took time). It was a dump, to say the least, and we gutted it to the bones (not my favorite part-but my husband loved it.). Our house is beautiful and I always have people say, "I would wait 10 years for a house like this." Hmmm... there was no magic formula, most people just aren't willing to wait. But, I must say, being the neat freak that I am, I did love how quick I could always get our 2 bedroom apartment SPOTLESS!
We bought our first home 2 1/2 years ago at 27 and 28. It's definitely a starter home (west of Utah Lake), but it has my absolute requirements of a porch and no siding. We're coping with its small size by working on finishing the basement.
I've always wanted to restore a gorgeous old Victorian, but that will have to wait until we win Publisher's Clearing House, because we are not do-it-yourselfers!
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