Last week’s Hot Topic struck a chord with many people. (In many cases, a dissonant one.)
So I’m inclined to go easy this week.
But I can’t resist warming things up again. I’m literally compelled to dip back into a pool of hullabaloo.
Yes, my friends, this week’s Hot Topic is none other than wedding rings.
My engagement/wedding ring is my most treasured possession of the earthly kind. (Mr. Dub and Miss Dub, of course, are way more priceless.)
Yes, I love its sparkle. And I, yes, love each and every one of the tiny diamonds that give it a unique, antique look.
And, yes, I love whoever special ordered the ring only to have their nuptials fall through. If it wasn’t for their discord, I might be stuck with a routine ring.
But what I love best about my ring is that Mr. Dub picked it out himself. Without any help.
OK, I did give him some tips.
“No gold.”
“Preferably a band.”
But I had absolutely no preferences beyond that. And I had no vision in my mind of what it should look like. Personally (because HTT is merely my opinion, no matter the topic), I like the idea that the guy gets to select the ring, seeing as it’s his money and his gift.
Frankly, I’m glad I didn’t see this ring before he gave it to me because I would have surely obsessed about it and been disappointed if I received anything else.
Because it’s perfect ... for me.
And there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t glance at it and think, “I can’t believe I got my dream ring.”
(Because, between you and me, I would have been happy with a plain band or even a little CZ.)
I won’t lie. I get a LOT of compliments on this ring. I think many women assume they have to get a ring just like their mom or their friend or the latest It bride. So many people are surprised to see that an engagement ring can come in such a different shape and size.
Most are inspired by it. A few make comments like, “Well, how do you have a wedding band with that?” To which I say, “Excuse me? That’s my bad ear.”
But what about you?
Do you looove your ring? Would you ever consider upgrading to another in years to come? (Blasphemy in my case, but remember I’m already perfectly pleased by my sparkler.)
Did you pick it out? Or did he?
What’s your ring story?
Do share. (And feel free to link to your blog, where a photo would be very helpful in the visualization department.)
*Special thanks to this gal for suggesting this habanero hot topic. Word on the street is she may be guest topic-ing next week!
4.17.2007
HTT - Sparkle Edition
Posted by Mrs. Dub at 6:45 AM
29 comments Leave a witty comment hereLabels: Hot Topic Tuesday, wedding rings
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29 comments:
I love my wedding ring as well. For lots of reasons…I love that my husband saved his money to get the ring I wanted even though I know it was more than he wanted to spend. I love that it is platinum. I love that it means that I am married to a wonderful man. I love that he didn’t mind not picking it out for me. I think it would be great if he had picked it out on his own, but I love that my sister Rachie and I went out to look and found the ring of my dreams together (and kind of funny too and I love funny). All my life my sister has helped me with the big decisions in my life (and the small ones too) so when it came to getting the ring I would wear forever she came through once again and helped me decide (I can be fickle). I don’t think Tom liked it at first, but when he saw that it was unique and what I really wanted he bought it for me and now we both LOVE IT.
i totally agree with you, mrs. dub. i think the boy should pick the ring. that's what my boy did. he surprised me by asking me to marry him, so the ring was definitely a surprise, too. i love my ring. it is perfect for me. it is plain and simple and not flashy. however, i don't wear it anymore. mike got me a skinny platinum wedding band that i now wear everyday. i pair it with my engagement band for special occasions (like church). here is a link to what it looks like:
http://barefootinthekitchen.blogspot.com/2006/10/its-all-about-metal.html
So I guess I am kind of a jerk or a brat or something much worse to even admit this, but I don't love my ring. I love my hubs more than anything. But I know that I will probably get another ring in the future, although I am already on my 2nd ring and we have been married 9 years. (For the record, he is on his 2nd ring too.) We got married very spur of the moment when I was 18 and he was 20. He didn't have any money and we had never really talked about what I might like. So he picked an inexpensive gold band. It was fine, although I don't like yellow gold and I prefer a little bling. We later put diamonds in it and I liked it better. I love being married and I wore the band with pride. But I never LOVED the ring. We talked about getting something different practically from the beginning. For my 6th anniversary, he suprised me with another ring. This one is white gold, more diamonds, and much nicer. I really like it, although he didn't consult me again. I switched my original band to my right hand and the newer ring on my left. I do get compliments on my new ring. But I can see myself stepping up again in the future and switiching this one to my right hand. I know that part of the problem is that I was raised surrounded by people with pretty large rocks, my own mom included. So I think my expectations are high and, unlike Mrs. Dub, I DID have expectations of what my ring should look like (and it hasn't been quite right yet).
This is officially my first Tuesday post. Laura's blog helps me get through the driest of days at work. And, though I enjoy the commentary, this is the first time I have felt an uncontrollable urge to share. So, here it goes...
My engagement ring is also, my favorite possession... because of the rich story that comes with it.
When I was just a wee thing, my mother received a huge promotion and bought herself the ring she had always wanted - a whopper to show off. Two years later, she was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer. In the search for the "perfect" treatment, my parents started to run out of savings. My (paternal) grandmother purchased the ring from my parents to help out and keep the ring in the family.
Though this stint with cancer found its way into remission, the ring remained with my grandmother. In the early winter of 2003, my grandmother passed away, leaving the ring to my father.
My husband worked with my father to get the ring remounted and presented it to me along with the magical question, "Will you marry me?"
By this time, my mother's cancer had returned and she died shortly before my wedding.
Each day I look at my ring I am filled with memories of my wonderful husband, stunning mother, and truly wise grandmother. I am so much a part of these women, and I am proud to be the third generation to don the knock-out.
Okay, I only have 2 seconds, and I didn't get a chance to read any other responses yet, but here is mine. I adore my ring. The band is carved and intricately beautiful. I have simple tastes in terms of clothing, worldly possessions, etc. It doesn't take much to make me truly happy. However, diamonds are my weakness. World travel? Who cares. Basic clothes? Who cares. Non-fancy car? Perfect. Big honkin' diamond ring that sparkles when I do the dishes and reminds me of my lovely husband? Priceless. I was 'upgraded' at 5 years (sorry to blaspheme on your blog!) but I kept the original proposal ring to give to my daughter. My Mom did that with me (as she was upgraded on her 25th anniv.) I don't like a large diamond because I think it impresses other people (is anyone really impressed anyway?) I just feel content to indulge in one impractical worldly vice...and a symbol of my marriage is a perfect indulgence...diamonds are forever, just like my family!
(Oh, and yes, my husband picked out my engagement ring!)
what a fun topic! i, too, love my ring and am not sure I will ever change it. I'd like to get another one for my right hand one day, just for fun. I'm a total diamond girl. I always wear small diamond studs my parents gave me for seminary graduation, a teensy little diamond in a silver band (from Tiffany & Co.) that Neal gave me for our 4th anniversary, a small asscher cut diamond pendant he gave me for our 6th, and my wedding ring, which I actually chose. Neal picked out the diamond, though, and bought it from an old jeweler friend in Louisiana. I had no idea he was going to get me something so big, and I absolutely LOVE it. It's very sparkly and practically colorless and I wouldn't change a thing about it. remind me one time to tell you about the diamond audrey is getting when she's an adult. it's an antique 2 carat beauty. :)
My sweet Mrs dubb how I love thee and love thy HTT ! I dont wear my ring - ever - my once normal(ish) man hands enjoyed the radiant sparkle of a lovely antique platinum ring along with my husbands grammas wedding band that was cool and old and I thought it was a beauty! The ravages of 4.7 children in the span of 7.6 years has made these man fingers into sausages -ones that Jimmy Dean himself would be proud to sell- and it would take the jaws of life to remove the delicate rings from my plump and sturdy hands.I picked out my ring told my man the who what wheres of aquiring it and that way worked for us but I can see the allure of a surprise ring that fits like it grew there and it being perfect. My rings need repairs because of their age and sometimes I think "Lets get a New Fatty-one Pronto" but then I think it is just a ring and a great family vaca' might be money well spent.Although it has been years since i donned the precious baubles I will find time every once and a great while to slide those sparklers on my pinky finger and dream of the day when they are fixed, my hands are back to their normal-ish man size, and a belt could be an actual accessory I could wear!
I love love love my ring(s). Ryan did all the work, but I was pretty specific about what I wanted (and had always wanted so he wanted to know so he did it right). And it is so right. I have the beautiful engagement ring (4 cm platinum band with the diamond), the wedding band (4 cm platinum) and the surprise 1st year anniversary ring (platinum with little diamonds all around). The only bummer is that I am too fat (read post-baby) to wear all three together, so I just wear the anniversary band or the engagement ring these days. I can't wait to wear all 3 together again and remember how much my man loves me.
And, sorry, but I would like an upgrade one day, not in the setting, just in the size/quality of diamond.
My sister-in-law just upgraded her wedding ring to a woppin' $40,000 ring. I think that is RIDICULOUS!!!!!!!!! I'm all for a little bling, but I could never justify spending that much for something that serves no purpose other than to say "look at me, I'm rich."
Really love my ring. But LOVE Ann's story about hers. Can we see it! That is such a beautiful story.
what about all the married men who go around not ever wearing their rings? i'm not okay with that. i can see if you're a mom & have 3 or 4 kids running around you (making it quite obvious that you're taken)and either can't or choose not to wear a ring, but a husband going off to work all day lookin' like he's available?not cool. what do you all think about that?
Fun Topic, and it was a hot one around here during my engagement time.
I am married to Practical Math Guy: He doesn't like to take chances on if I'll like something or not. I mentioned that if he picked something out himself I'd be happy because he picked it out. He absolutely refused. He asked me what I wanted in a ring and took me shopping. What I really wanted was an emerald-cut diamond solitaire with a gold band (I look better in gold.)
While shopping I approached it like a business negotiation. I start high, he starts low, we meet someplace in the middle. He pointed out to me that I could get twice the size of diamond if I went with a round instead of an emerald cut. I said I'd rather have half the diamond and the style that I liked, since he said he wanted that for me in the first place. Negotiations broke down.
Eventually, my mother-in-law called me and just asked what I wanted. I said an emerald-cut solitaire. She called in a favor with her jeweler and picked out a ring for me. She actually faxed us a picture of the ring and then brought it to us from across the country. So I got my dream ring thanks to my MIL. She and I have gotten along ever since.
I wear my emerald-cut solitaire with two baguettes anniversary bands on either side and I LOVE THEM. My husband is always joking that I'm going to run out of finger (wedding band, solitaire, two anniversary bands) before rings.
I'd consider upgrading my center stone, but it's a beautiful stone that would cost a lot to replicate the quality in a larger size. I don't see that as a possibility or a priority at this point in our lives.
hey les-- mike doesn't wear his ring. ever. it gives him a rash. we should probably just get it made bigger or something. but we are lazy. it usually doesn't bother me, since he works with a bunch of guys and an old, crippled lady receptionist.
well gee... mrs. dub... I don't need to take all the credit since we kinda' came up with this together in an 'e-versation' But I'm so glad you posted about it... I love antique looking rings and yours is no exception!
David picked out my ring all by himself. I told him I wanted a princess cut diamond and white gold (if we/he'd had the money I would've gotten platinum... but maybe at a later date)I was pleasantly surprised by his choice since he never took me ring shopping and just bought it himself. He's lucky, b/c I'm picky (I know, that sounds snotty, but I am... (picky that is, hopefully not snotty) heck I've been wearing it every day for the past 6 years, I think I should be able to be picky about whats on my finger!)
I've got to be honest though, I would like something bigger (the center stone is .48 carat) someday. My uncle is a goldsmith and has a store in Pao Alto CA. He makes beautiful stuff and all my cousins have had their rings done by him. I felt bad for not using him... but it wasn't my choice... besides he'd probably rather have our business when we've got the money to spend. (When do you ever have that?!) I'll take a picture and post it if I get a chance...
living in provo as a college goer - i was totally turned off by all those girls who were so obsessed about "the ring." especially because all these people getting married were poor students, usually living on student loans. don't get me wrong, i would like a phatty ring but i don't think it is really that important. it is nice to be reminded of your marriage/ love by looking at your ring - but after all, it is just a ring. but yes dub, i love yours.
steph, you may inform your dear mike that i am thoroughly disappointed. and this, after i praised him to pieces on my blog! i still love him, though, because i'll never ever forget how he got up with audrey when she was a very sick baby so that i could sleep. :)
get that ring sized. you never know what rosie's really thinking.
I hesitate to post this, because it sounds worldly and out of focus on what really matters, but, I am woman, hear me roar, so here goes:
I don't like my wedding ring. Because the diamond isn't very big and not set the way I like. And the sad part? I helped choose it. My husband is good humored about it. In fact, he bought me a thick gold band which I wear until we can "upgrade". We joke around about it, but when it comes down to it, I really do want a little more blingety-bling on my finger. But, I insist on being patient and waiting until after we've paid off student loans, taken the kids to Disneyland a few times, set up the college funds, etc. etc.
There you have it. If I had a "do over", I would choose a different ring. (and to clarify: same husband, different ring!)
Love my ring. My husband had better taste than I did. I was pretty much expecting the same old band and diamond, but WHA-LA, I got a great ring. There's more info of WHY I love my ring, and pictures at:
www.crazyfunlaytons.blogspot.com
love my ring. i designed it when i was in 4th grade (along with my wedding dress). mr. r surprised me by putting 5 diamonds in it--one for every year we "dated" before our marriage.
one day i would love to add more diamonds to the collection because of what they represent. i personally don't think anything is wrong with a little add on to the original ring--especially as you add on to your family and relationship. the sentimental part of me thinks it is sad to ditch the original symbol. although i do kind of like the idea of giving the original symbol to your daughter or something like leisha was saying. interesting idea. i love how special that makes it to pass it down. i am all about passed on jewelry.
By request, here is a link to a picture of my ring. If you are confused... see above posting. It is not the "best" picture of my ring, but you get the idea. http://picasaweb.google.com/mckidd/MikeAndAnnWedding/photo#4972431514356285458
I LOVE my ring. Ryan and I both picked it out. Ryan spent months finding the right diamond. He didn't want it to have any flaws...like anyone really notices!
It is platinum with a brillant cut diamond and 2 anniversary bands on the sides. Lately, the ring is a litte small these days.I am either bloated or fatter. I have another ring Ryan bought me for our 5 year anniversary. The ring was also a gift for pushing 2 babies out of 1 uterus. Anyway, I have two rings now that I alternate with outfits. They both have special meaning. I hope to get another one for our 10 year. I love all the sparkle on Mrs. Dubs so I am going to copy...but I think I will do CZ this time. I saw the movie "Blood Diamond" and I only want conflict free diamonds. Is it possible to be politically correct and vain at the same time? Don't hate me for wanting a little bling-bling.
p.s. Laurel's ring is so prettty. It is classy with a touch of vintage! I was so happy she wanted me to help with that important decision. Love you sis!
OKAY GIRLS... lets see some photos (I'll post mine this even'... I'm about to go spend the day at the dr's and the dentist office!) But they all sound gorgeous!
And, Ann... all your wedding pictures are so neat... very good photographer!
Ann's pictures make me want to get married all over again.
I have a good friend who worked at a little mom and pop jewelry store in Provo. In our single days, I would sit on the other side of the case while she would hand me rings to try on. We played games- if I could only pick a ring from this case. If he could only afford a wedding band. If he could afford whatever I wanted (that would have been a 2 ct- I like my jewelry big!)
When the proposal came, I was totally surprised with exactly what I wanted. It was the "less expensive" favorite. "Do you want a BIG diamond or a lot of little ones and a house?", and since I ain't no dummy, I happily accepted his choice of rings.
Here is a picture of mine. And our sweet 2nd baby boy. www.mandeegrant.blogspot.com
So, my picture isn't working... maybe next time.
So, this is last weeks HTT, but I thought I would still post a comment. My story is the most different and odd. My husband came home from his mission to Texas and I was living in Provo. I had somewhat "waited" for him and I did greet him in TX when he came home. I went back to Provo and we decided to get married via phone even though we weren't engaged until he proposed (obviously). He wanted me to pick out my ring for the same reason as a previous post, he didn't want to spend that much money unless he knew I was going to like it. I always knew that I wanted a platinum band solitaire princess cut diamond. The bigger, the better (it's .9 carats). I had some money from accounts my dad had set up when I was little and as odd as it may be I asked if I could use that money to buy my wedding ring. I figured we might as well not have ring debt since we are both going to have the same bank account in the end. My husband was fine with it as were my parents so I went and bought my ring. It was less than it would have been since I paid cash and I didn't even have to pay sales tax since the ring was being shipped to TX (as though purchased in TX). Even though it is somewhat boring since it's a thin band with a single diamond, it was the exact ring I would draw pictures of for my best friend when we would talk about rings. So, although it is simple ring, I totally love it and I don't mind that I bought it. It is exactly the relationship that my husband and I have. I think it wouldn't have been this way if I hadn't known him for 7 years prior to our engagement (we had dated for about 3 not counting the mission).
my sister-in-law loves turqoise so the ring she really wanted is a turqoise stone with some small diamonds on the sides.
it's been so disappointing to her and to me that the reactions she usually gets to her ring are along the lines of "oh, well you can upgrade in a few years."
I guess I like to think that a ring is a nice symbol of eternity and a way to show the world "i'm committed" but the size and the clarity doesn't actually define the relationship it represents.
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