Feeding Frenzy

This week’s Hot Topic is a reader request:

BREASTFEEDING

(Cue scary music.)

First, I must tell you that I am a breastfeeder. Yes, ladies and gentleman, every 3-4 hours, I nurse my lil’ Miss. She likes the milk. I like that it’s chock full of vitamins. And did I mention it’s really cheap?

So if you’re looking for someone to argue that breastmilk is nasty, you best look somewhere else.

(Although, please lighten up on women who use formula. There are lots of good, valid reasons to do so, including “just because.”)

But when it comes to the nuances of nursing, I’m all over the map, as are many of you.

Case in point: This magazine cover, which I saw at my local doctor’s office and thoroughly applauded. Yet, knowing some of you are a bit more prudish, I didn’t have the guts to post it on my own blog. Sad!

Because I’m going to let you in on a little secret: Breastmilk comes from breasts - big, fat breasts. And there is nothing sexual about it, so get it over it, America! In nearly every other country, including those in the Middle East, exposing your breast for the purpose of nursing is totally acceptable. It’s not pornography. It’s not inappropriate. It’s just a breast, for heaven’s sake.

And it’s not that easy to nurse a baby under a blanket. Some mothers are masters at this. I, however, have a little girl who doesn’t like anything on her face and enjoys a chat halfway through each side. So it’s nearly impossible for me to stay covered up. Luckily, she’s never been a snacker so I can usually nurse her in the privacy of my own home, where nudity is highly encouraged. (Miss Dub’s cheeks are awfully cute, after all. Yes, those cheeks.)

But here’s the catch – since we live in a culture that frowns (sadly) on public breastfeeding, I think we should be a bit discreet. I think that if you’re out about town, you should cover up while nursing. I’ve been on the other side and it’s awfully uncomfortable to stare down “the one-eyed monster” while eating at the food court. It’s silly, I know, but that’s the truth. (And it’s even worse for guys – just ask your husbands!)

Now, I don’t think you need to be relegated to the mother’s lounge. I had a friend who recently suggested a breastfeeding revolution, where mothers would (blanket on shoulder) quietly nurse their babies in the chapel at church. And I say, “Viva La Revolucion!” Because it’s not right that you have to lug yourself, your baby and any other children (depending on the location of your spouse) out of the chapel just so you can cover yourself up in another room and nurse. What is spiritually or family oriented about that?

So be discreet, but don’t be discomfited.

Unless, of course, you’re nursing your third grader. I mean, I’m all for nursing your children until they are 1 year old. And I can even understand doing it until they are 2 years old. (Although you probably need to restrict those nursing sessions to your house since a 2-year-old is fully capable of undoing your shirt and proclaiming something along the lines of, “Look at mommy’s ta-tas!” … which is why I’ll be stopping when Miss Dub approaches her first birthday.)

But any older than that and I’m seriously disturbed.

I interviewed a mother once who was still nursing her 8-year-old (!!!) son … but only when he needed some “extra attention.” Um, it’s called a hug and you can keep your shirt on for those.

There is absolutely NO REASON someone should be a nursing a child or a teenager. And I’m pretty sure you can’t tell me a valid reason why you should, unless it’s a selfish one (“But I love it so much!”) or an emergency (“We were stranded in the desert for five weeks!).

So there you have it, my totally random, contradictory thoughts on breastfeeding.

Now, excuse me, Miss Dub wants a little nibble.

What do you think? Should I cover up?