Freaky Friday

I spent a ridiculous chunk of nap time yesterday rereading the archives of one of my "love-to-hate-you" bloggers. (I won't name names, but, no, it's not her.)

Rather than just mindlessly read about her purposeful existence, I began to mindlessly take notes, as well. This has to do with a book that I recently read - "Getting Things Done" by David Allen - that focuses on writing EVERYTHING down so that your mind can be free. Hence I now have a list with such random notes as "More fruits and veggies for Miss Dub!" and "Display everything in glass jars." Granted, I will probably continue to supply cookies to my precious offspring when she squeals, "Pweese!" And I will probably put off buying glass jars until I'm sufficiently content with my spring shoe collection - BUT the important thing is that I've clarified what I want to do so that I don't have to obsess over it all day.

But as I was writing all these things down, and feeling intense guilt that I haven't been scouring thrift stores for months to decorate for an upcoming church event, I thought about what it would be like to be another person; to live like the personas created by some of our favorite bloggers, who intentionally or not come across as the most engaging, spontaneous and creative folk in the universe.

So I'm going to try for 24 hours to be this dream person that I've been taking notes about for years. I'm going to push myself to live a little larger and more colorful rather than settling for pretty good. My meals will be prettier. My activities will be grander. And we'll see for once and all if it makes me any happier.

However, I can't do it tomorrow. I'm in charge of decorations for a church event and have just barely started to think about them.

But Friday will be my experiment.

Anyone want to join me?

Positive power

I recently read The Secret.

And let me let you in on a secret about The Secret: There is no secret.

I kept waiting for some bizarre confession, like "rub yourself with butter four times and day while chanting, 'I love macramé!' and you'll be rich and famous."

But instead the whole book was about faith. Faith in a higher power, which the author calls "The Universe" and I call "Heavenly Father." And faith in yourself.

Having faith in God is complicated, of course, but it's easier most times than having faith in yourself. God is omniscient, omnipresent, perfect. And me? Well, let's just say I'm a little rough around the edges.

It's so hard to think positively about yourself when we live in a world that makes a living off of our weaknesses. We're considered haughty or ignorant if we think we're smart or talented or, heaven forbid, beautiful.

(Mariann Williamson's famous passage comes to mind: "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.")

Thinking well of ourselves CAN make a huge difference. Will it magnetically bring you lavish results as The Secret promises? The jury (and my $25,000 check) is still out. However, you will feel better about yourself. And when you truly feel good, you feel optimistic. And when you feel optimistic, you feel empowered. And when you are empowered, nothing can stop you.

Try it. Watch your thoughts today and turn every negative phrase into a positive thought.

Instead of, "I'm so fat!" ... Say, "I'm perfect the way I am. I make good food choices. I am able to remake my body right now."

It sounds really hoaky, but it works. Pretty soon you'll think you're so perfect that you will become perfect.

And then you'll die.

'Cause I was sort of thinking that The Secret involved some sort of eternal life serum, but, alas, death is still included.

But at least you'll have a lived a good life.

Not good enough

Tons of companies have made as fortune off of “good enough.”

Convenience foods that are good enough when you’re too tired to cook. Sending an email because a card is too time-consuming. Shortcuts to bypass hard work. Last-minute planning. Half-hearted workmanship. Anything that falls short of perfect but still does the job.

Good enough is pretty great, actually. When you’re stressed and don’t want to totally cop out of something you can always settle for good enough. And let’s face it, sometimes good enough is a good as it gets because sometimes good enough is the best you can do.

But I think a lot of the unfulfillment we feel in our modern lives stems from settling for good enough. The world tells us it’s OK to be good enough or do something just well enough, and we’re so accustomed to convenience that we feel unduly burdened by any extra effort. Being a dutiful employee is old-fashioned. Cooking a cake from scratch is archaic. Calling all our family members individually in lieu of a mass email is just foolish. … or so the world would have us think.

But so much in life is rewarding because of the work involved. It’s usually the road to get somewhere that means more to us than the final destination. Our proudest accomplishments aren’t when we opted to do something the easy way but when we forced ourselves to do something that was hard - when we said no to good enough.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not a fan of stress. I think good enough should be good enough in many areas of our lives. You just have to decide what ones they are.

If an assignment at work is overwhelming, delegate! If planning and preparing a big soiree by yourself makes you sweat, order some pizza and tell your friends to bring the drinks.

But usually it’s not dinner parties we end up regretting. It’s good intentions that never turn into actions that haunt us. It’s not doing enough for others that is rarely good enough

So make a pledge to yourself that you won’t settle for good enough as much; that only your best will be good enough.

Because while good enough feels good, your best feels better.

I promise.



LABL Step #2: Write down three areas where only your best will do.

Life starts now!

I’d been thinking about this topic a lot lately, but last Friday seared it into my brain. First I heard about a blog reader (and friend of a friend) who tragically lost her baby to SIDS. Then I heard some potentially bad news about the unborn child of a good friend.

Why do bad things happen to good people? I don’t know. And I’m not even going to venture a guess. I do have faith that there’s a reason for everything in our lives, good and bad, but usually we can’t see a purpose to the latter. And that’s OK. Sometimes surviving is good enough.

But sometimes surviving isn’t enough. Like when your life is going fine, and yet you choose to grumble about silly details. Or when you are lucky enough to have healthy children, but still find yourself fixating on your post-baby body. It’s human to complain. It’s human to be lazy. It’s human to be discontent with life.

But what if life could be better? What if you could make a difference to you?

LIVE A BETTER LIFE.

It’s a phrase that’s been going through my mind lately as it dawns on me that I’ve only got one life to live and no idea how long it will be. And while I struggle finding a balance between being humble and patient, and going the extra mile to make dreams come true, I do think there is middle ground out there. And rather than talk about it, allude to it and set dates to get to it, I’m going to find it now.

Today is the day I stop complaining and start living.

What does it mean to LIVE A BETTER LIFE?

It depends on each person, I suppose. For some people, it will mean living bigger – more spontaneity, more laughing, more pursuits. For others, it will mean living smaller – more peaceful moments, more simple activities, more time for others. But everyone will take a moment before doing anything and think, “Am I living my best life?”

That could mean putting back a second cookie, or having it without feeling guilt. It could mean calling an acquaintance to see if they need anything, or hanging up the phone and having a chat with your husband.

For everyone it will mean less laziness, less procrastination, less hesitation. Undoubtedly it will mean less focus on yourself and more on others, which will mean more smiles all around.

And for everyone it will mean a better life. A life with purpose. A life that doesn’t just happen. A life that you create.

Anyone else want to join me and LIVE A BETTER LIFE?

‘Cause I’m all in.





LABL Step #1: Write down 5 ways your life could be BETTER.